Happy chicks Happy chocolate Happy bunny laying eggs Happy ham Happy lamb Happy Monday home from work Happy basket Happy bonnet Happy skimpy clothes for spring Happy church Happy clappy Happy hands up in the air Happy holy hypocrites Happy full of ignorance Happy minds checked at the door Happy zombie Happy pastor Happy preying on the poor Happy rightness Happy judging Happy denigrating gays Happy silly superstition Happy moribund tradition Happy priests as they’re bonking little boys Happy hating Happy #tcot Happy morals down your throat Happy empty grey building Happy stern old women Happy dog-collared, slightly effeminate moist-handed vicars drinking tea with stern old women during a pointless committee meeting Happy what are Christians for, anyway? Happy shopping Happy sales Happy iPad delivery weekend!
But I think, ‘Happy Easter’ should mean ‘Happy Jesus is alive’ or ‘Happy new life to the world’.
(This is the part of the post where I could do a big apology, but since it is Easter I’ll write something hopeful.)
God likes you. Quite a lot. That was Jesus’s point. His life and death and resurrection (yeah, that’s a tough one to swallow, but why not leave some space for mystery?) were a whispered shout to the world that God likes us all. God’s not angry.
Infuriatingly, God really does like everyone. Jesus hung out with the traitor tax collectors and the prostitutes AND the religious elite. He healed the sick, whether they were poor or rich OR Imperial Roman oppressors. Jesus will save you and drive you nuts. In a good way. He called it ‘life to the full’.
Whether you consider yourself a Christian or not, I wish you a year full of Life. I wish you meet a human who is following Jesus, not a religion. I wish you a happy Easter.
Apple say I want an iPad, so obviously I do, but I can’t figure out why. It’s gorgeous, fantastical, lovely and most certainly magical — Apple said so — but it IS just a big iPod Touch, isn’t it? Ever since they announced it I have been listening to Steven Fry’s oohing and Neven Mrgan’s hyperventilating and regularly using all my thinking thoughts to try and figure out why I need one. I don’t, because it’s a big iPod touch, and I have an iPhone, which is better.
So here’s the deal: I will draw a pretty, shiny picture on my iPhone for anyone who can convince me that the iPad, the one which actually exists now, not the nth generation one that replaces my MacBook, is something other than a big fast iPod Touch. Please feel free to use any means you feel appropriate, from a link to something already on the Internet to a video which you have lovingly created (on a device other than your iPad, obvs). I and the at least a bazillion other people with Kool Aid moustaches who want an iPad but don’t know why will be truly grateful.
As you get busy, please keep in mind that the iWork suite is not convincing. The iPad is too big to fit in my pocket, so that means bringing a bag, and if I’m bringing a bag, I can bring my MacBook with my Photoshop and my Illustrator and my InDesign and my iWork and the other little tools I use to make stuff. What I’m saying is that the mobile iWork looks great, but it’s not enough more mobile than my laptop to make up for all I would leave behind.